Since when did stress become the new black?

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As you know, the topic of stress and the direct impact on hormone health totally intrigues me.  So much so, I created an ecourse around it.  Since stepping back into clinical practice I’ve been able to put my theories to the test yet again (and may I just say WOW! Thank you for my welcome in return – it’s been amazingly fulfilling).  In doing so, my concern has shifted a little; it isn’t so much for the women of reproductive age, but more so the younger women experiencing a new level of pressure like I had never known.  If you’re 19 and not living life at an epic speed, it seems you’re not ‘living.’  As if there aren’t enough stresses that exist in modern living, now it’s affecting us earlier and earlier.

Speaking with a patient recently, I had said to her “there’s no need to stress just because everybody else is – that’s their business, not yours.  What’s more, stress doesn’t equate to success.” Beautifully, I saw the relief wash over her face.  She totally understood and to her credit, had diligently started to change her approach to everyday living.  She told me how her friends had commented on how ‘lazy’ she had been over the holidays and how ‘lucky’ she was that she didn’t have to stress about ‘things.’ I commended her. Stress was a choice and one she wasn’t choosing, certainly not out of laziness or lack of motivation but because she was in control of the remote and she was selecting ease.  Sadly, her friends didn’t share the perspective – yet.  We are all fine examples of what our hope is for the world. The more we live in this truth, the more of it we find.  Ain’t life exceptional?

I’m here now to tell you this much:

Stress is not directly proportional to your ability to achieve.

Stress isn’t something you need to live up to.  Contrary to what we are being conditioned to believe (by whom exactly, besides peers or cranky bosses, I’m really not sure), stress isn’t a measure of success.  I remember as a young student thinking that the exceedingly long hours I put in would equate to high results.  What a mistruth that was.  It took me a very long time to discover for myself that it’s quality not quantity that counts and I stand by that to this very day – especially since having children.  And even more disturbing today is the expectation placed upon some of us to be stressed, because that shows you ‘care’, is madness.

So what are you choosing?  I ask my patients this very question when they are faced with situations of pressure.  Are you choosing stress because it’s the new black and every other person is?  Or are you choosing ease.  Only you have the ability to decide.  There comes a sense of relief when you get the perspective that things don’t, no matter what, have to be stressful. 2014 for me was epic on so many levels.  2015, we are approaching with ease, and always coming back to the life we want to create, rather that the one we find ourselves being pressured to live.

Live by truth.  Live in love.  The rest will find it’s own way.

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